Lametones de Amor

Una llamada a la incorrección en agradables tonos pastel

Esos domingos de extática indulgencia

Se les da la bienvenida, estimados lectores y el resto. El sueño del estado del bienestar genera monstruos, eso lo sabe cualquiera que haya visitado alguna vez una facultad de Bellas Artes o, en menor grado, de Filosofía. Junten ustedes un sustento alimenticio asegurado con muchos días de ocio y asueto contemplativo y se harán una idea de la de necedades que pueden surgir de tardes inanes de proceso creativo. ¿Cómo dicen?, ¿que lo que obtienen fácilmente se podría equiparar moralmente a Lametones de Amor? Emm… err, un poco sí, con una salvedad: nosotros nunca hemos pretendido obtener beneficio material de nuestra creación. Nosotros, a diferencia de Amenábar, no queremos su dinero (ref.: MB #35 ó 36, chi lo sa?).
Pero bueno, no dejemos a la libertad de conciecia divagar sobre las etéreas formas de nuestra vaguedad verbal. Nave industrial atestada de gentes de elevada sensibilidad disfrutando de videoarte, sesiones de erótico fino en directo (spanking, carne aprisionada y sufrimiento del cuerpo en el amor) y/o recitales de poesía existencialista musicadas por una piara de jabalís ciegos de éxtasis trotando por un juego de paelleras de El Corte Inglés, cuando uno entra en un sitio así le vienen a la cabeza muchas cosas y pocas terminan sin sangre en el suelo. Que conste en acta también que íbamos sobre aviso, de hecho, al ver que se propiciaba una noche de pose de las de aupa, tuvimos que ir al H&M a comprarle a Casimiro un chalequito a rombos que quedó divinamente retro con su raya al lado. Tanto se asemejaba su insensible servidor a un personaje de “Cuéntame” que hubo alguno que gustoso hubiese pagado una riñonada por el vestuario en alguna tienda de segunda mano cool, pese a que nosotros insitiamos en que era nuevo de trinca.

Si tú estudias diseño, yo fontanero nuclear
De todos modos, si se preguntan el porqué de nuestra presencia en tan inicuo lugar, la respuesta es sencilla y concisa: doña Amanda, su referente cultural y estético favorito, tenía que hacer una suplencia en el seno del grupo de electropop Ultraplayback, concretamente de la sinpar Ponny Tail, cuyo paradero actual en el espacio y en el tiempo no coincide ni por asomo con las actuaciones del propio grupo. Así que ya ven, se nos brinda la oportunidad de entrar gratis a las fiestas y de compartir escenario y bambalinas con figuras de la escena underground cuyas ínfulas sobrepasan a veces límites de lo que se puede considerar humano. Si además es usted una de esas personas que suele ir prácticamente sobrio en cualquier situación, el abismo entre uno y los adulterados arties se hace ya insalvable. De hecho, muy a menudo, nos da la impresión de que en esas conversaciones medio gritadas y medio intuidas, quedamos como unos insoportables gilipollas, pero por suerte nuestras vacuidades quedan diluidas en la oscuridad de la necia noche y en sonrisas de incomprensión. Más o menos como en las reuniones familiares.
Aun así, pese a lo hastiante de la situación, ya les decimos que el planazo para este fin de semana en Barcelona, por una vez y sin que sirva de precendente, era considerablemente mejor que el que habiamos encontrado para Madrid. Recuérdennos, si alguna vez decimos lo contrario, que preferimos cortarnos las venas con una cucharilla de postre oxidada a frecuentar reuniones sociales como la que nos brindaba el CSO El Antídoto

Físicamente sucios, moralmente.

Les juramos que no hay ni un retoque digital en el cartel, ni siquera la frase del pie. Es dramático que hasta los propios perroflautas estén hasta los mismísimos de la abundancia canina en las reuniones con sus semejantes. Por no hablar del comedor vegano por la financiación, que para estar en contra del kapital bien que cobran por servir zanahorias con seitán y acompañamiento de cartón y zumo de apio. ¡Lava tu perro, lava tu perro!

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